waking the fuck up

why the fuck are love and relationships so difficult. we are dealing with many generations of dysfunction and being unaware. i feel blessed that we live in an age to find answers if we look for them. we get to be exposed to all the masters, buddha, deepak, eckert , gandhi. we are so blessed to have such wisdom to learn from and apply to our lives. if we can only turn off the chatter and choose a path that serves our greater good.  we can learn from the past and put that beast to rest for good it is an opportunity to heal the past therefore creating a positive future and whats to come.we get to choose and choose some more. beautiful lessons.a work in progress couldn't be more true. best if the work is growth. in my meditations. i have looked deep and seen my own growth it is a path to freedom. living deliberately . since i have been setting short term goal and setting my intentions. my attitude and success has dramatically improved. question everything then seek to find and understand. i had to adopt this in order to deal with the life i created. from my health to the end of a life i had  with someone i loved.even in such a short time. this process has helped me heal and love myself again. i am looking for ways to be of service o others in the most simplest forms of love and expression of gratitude.this time is all we have. as i write this today. today is the anniversary of my father's sudden death from 1988. all the things i could say. i wish i knew then what i know now. wishing gets you nowhere  i am all about action living now no holding back. right now. is important. being present takes practice change takes practice. it's a good life when you show up. and get clear.i am loving the feeling of being familiar to myself again. i see the light and feel the love towards me.and you. dropping blame lightened my heart and improved my well being my aura feels brighter. i'm awake to it. thank God if you will.