Friday, December 5, 2008

99 cent Store Assorted Soft Touch Condoms

Wanna keep your Twinkie fresh? Check out this Twinkie holder I found at the 99 cent store. The hat lifts up and you slide your twinkie right in the hole. Now you can wrap your lips around a fresh Twinkie letting you decide when you want the cream filling.

Twinkie the kid. I like the idea of Twinkie the Thug. Or you can pick if you want a crips or bloods style holder. Go team!

If youre feeling frisky or hungry you cant beat the deals at the 99 cent store. Nothing is over 99 cents. They play a recorded, non-stop, promise that nothing is over 99 cents. Ever. This is good to know every 2 minutes.
If it says on the package that it is 2 fitty, it is 99 cents. If you miss your monthly menses, go there. Why waste $14.99 at Walgreen's? Buy 5 just in case 4 outta 5 read different. If you decide on the negative reading, pick up some condoms, a pack of 12 is roughly only 99 cents, making each shot only 8 1/4 cents! Nothing cost that much anymore!

One time I bought trash bags there. Every time I tried to line the trash can, that piece of crap would literally split up/down the side, I went through about 8 of these and decided that 20 for 99 cents was not a deal. I just through a whole 99 cents with no bag into the can.
Keep this in mind if you decide to go there as your main source for birth control.

Have you ever been to a 99 cent store? The one I infrequent has food. Um... well, they have a dairy case and a giant bin of veggies in front of that. This scares me just a little. A-lot actually. Where do they get it? Is it expired?

They also have TONS of candy. What ever you can think of they have, but this is what I found to be kinda nast:

This is marshmallow fast food... Like, we need more junk food in the form of... a... junk food? I'm sure it tastes no different then a "PEEP" but the Easter Bunny doesnt really want us to eat those either. This stuff is made in San Diego. San Diego should know better.

Now I love fries and the fries pictured actually look like tasty fries. The good thing about the 99 cent store is nothing ever goes bad in there. And bugs are nowhere to be found because not even bugs will eat the food, er... the stuff they're selling as food.
I picked up some glow sticks for the face sucking fest that I know will ensue tonight. I cant remember what else I got, but I paid for about 23 things. I spent approx $25 there. I hope the damn glow sticks work.


T said...

Ew. The marshmallow fries and pizza are WAY over the top.

Condoms too? Seriously?!?

You had fun shopping there, didn't you? The whole time you were thinking... "This is SO blogworthy..."


Wow, that was awkward said...

The buck stops here Momo. This blog makes no cents (100). George Washington wouldn't pay a dollah to read this.

Stupid comment, I know. It's Monday.

Hey, my word verification is billarcl. Funny bill is in it.

Nice Peace of Buddhy said...

@ T : Fun yes! There is so much crap in there. I dont trust any of it tho.

@ Wow: ..... billackl.

Kimmie said...

Oh the good ol 99 cent store.

Did you notice we no longer have the cents symbol on our keyboards.

San Diego is the home of marshmellow food. I just bought a marshmellow burrito with marshmellow tortilla chips. Yummy.

They have across the street from our 99 cent store a 98 cent store and a couple of blocks away is the $1.08 store. I kid you not. They have much better quality crap.

Nice Peace of Buddhy said...

Does the mashmallow foods have different flavors, or do you just love the taste? If they taste the same is it the form it's in? I need to know Kimmie.

Do they charge tax at the $1.08 store? You have raised so many questions...